I haven’t participated in Five Minute Friday in awhile. That’s when I join Lisa-Jo and her friends and write for five minutes without stopping or editing on whatever word she assigns. This week the word is “Belong.” Read more FMF posts here.
I’ve spent a lot of my life feeling like I didn’t fit exactly. I was too this or not enough that. I haven’t had many times in my life where I felt like many people knew who I really was. Many times I felt like an outsider looking in on other people’s lives while mine seemed suspended in time somewhere.
I know we weren’t meant to be eternally happy here. This isn’t the “true Narnia.” But still it’s nice to have pieces of time when I feel like I’m where I’m supposed to be at exactly the right time.
I feel that here. This feels like the place where I fit.
Sure, I live in a beautiful place, but it’s more than just the scenery.
I have friends here, but it’s not even that people know me any better here than anywhere else I’ve lived. Maybe it’s my age. Maybe I’m more comfortable in my own skin now that I don’t feel like I have to be the most loved person in the room.
I know it’s not because I don’t have any problems here, because even in this tropical paradise, bad things happen and I find myself fighting some of the same battles I’ve had to fight over and over again. Even now, my heart is broken over sad things I can’t fix.
But even in the midst of the ugly, it is well with my soul here. I can breathe here. I feel most like whomever I’m supposed to be here.
I don’t know how long this place will be my home. But I’m thankful for this moment. I’m thankful for the minutes in my day when I can stop and look around and know I’m exactly where I belong.
For this place, for this now, I am grateful.