Watch out, Martha.

I put a period instead of an exclamation point after that title because it’s actually meant to be sarcastic.

Speaking of sarcastic, have you heard about the new sarcasm punctuation point? Ralph wanted to know if I’d be making use of it since he claims I’m the most sarcastic person he knows. First, Ralph should meet more people. Second, if you have to explain to someone that you’re being sarcastic it means you aren’t doing it right or they’re incapable of getting sarcasm, with or without the special punctuation mark.

And now I’m sidetracked. I was talking about the title of today’s post. I’m telling Martha Stewart to watch out because as soon as I finish talking to you I’m going to….gulp…Craft Day at my friend Tanya’s. Tanya is skilled at the making of crafts. Every time I’m at her house, I mentally photograph at least one cute, creative idea that I think I can actually do myself. I am not so skilled at  the making of crafts. It’s a long, long story and maybe we’ll talk it about it on another day when I have more time.

About a month ago (Tanya is also very organized and makes use of a box of squares that she calls a “calendar.”), she asked if my youngest two could come over to make a Valentine’s craft. We can, so we are. I get to bring the snacks. I think I missed out on my opportunity to be part of the crafting process when Tanya texted me yesterday to see if I had any white tempera paint that I could bring and I told her I’d never owned my own tempera paints. I thought you had to have actual proof that you were a teacher to own your own and wasn’t aware you could just buy it over-the-counter. Apparently they sell it at stores to anyone who wants to buy it. Who knew?

So I have to leave now so that we won’t be late for the crafting. Apparently tempera paint will be involved. I’m pretty sure hilarity will ensue.

I hope you have a crafty day, too. Indulge your creative side today. Doodle on the notepad that you keep by your phone. Martha wouldn’t count it as crafting, but I will.

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12 Comments

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12 responses to “Watch out, Martha.

  1. You crack me up. Can’t wait to see what you make. And if it makes you feel any better, I’ve been crafty for — well, since birth and still have never owned my own tempera paints. Oils, pastels, watercolors, latex … all that! Just never tempera. 🙂

  2. Amy

    What could be better? Paint crafting with the littles at a friend’s house, with said crafty friend leading the crafting? It’s perfect! I love some crafts, but not kid crafts. (You really want to do rubber stamps again? We just did that 6 months ago!)

  3. Please do not fail to appreciate the glory of your kids getting to do crafts (which they love to do) at SOMEONE ELSE’S HOUSE. That means someone else’s mess and someone else’s storage. GLORIOUS!

  4. I am SO with you on the lack-o’-craftiness. And I wish I’d thought of the sarcasm mark.

  5. Kay

    You are too hilariously funny. I could actually type in LOL and mean it here! But I don’t do that. Sarcastic I don’t know about – I have a feeling that’s because I’m sarcastic too and sarcasm doesn’t recognize sarcasm in others; it just assumes those jabs and slams are normal, everyday conversation. Hum. But you’re definitely funny!

  6. Gretchen

    You know, there is an upside to not being crafty: no crafting supplies to pack, unpack, say you’ll use, & then merely allow them to sit in wasted space. No sarcasm.

    But normally, it’s a language I speak all too well. 😉

  7. carpoolqueen

    We do not craft. Little boys and hot glue guns don’t mix.

  8. this is such a hilarious post! Every little bit of it.

    (my children are fluent in deadpan sarcasm. still not sure if that’s something I should be proud of)

    OVER THE COUNTER TEMPERA PAINTS?

    HAHAHAHA

  9. Girl. You are too much!!!

    Why do you think I majored in education?! So, I could by prescription tempera, of course!!

    I love craftiness, watching and participating…hope your time was super fun!

  10. tanya

    Your snack was the best! You are crafty in different and better tasting ways!

  11. I think you just need a little help dusting off your inner crafter. I think she’s hiding in there somewhere as evidenced by the cones and the um, um… surely you’ve posted a pic of a crafty project you’ve made. My memory fails me.

    And if we never recover your inner crafty girl, you’ve got humor to fall back on.

    Love you.

  12. BTW, did you notice that you had THREE posts dedicated to crafty/un-crafty day. I’d say that counts for some craftiness.

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