Most moms assume a call from the school means they have a sick child that needs to come home. I assume one of my kids has said or done something that the teachers found too hilarious to wait until pick-up line to tell me. They almost always start the conversation the same way: “You’ll never guess what ______ said/did today.”
“Nope. I probably won’t. So why don’t you go ahead and tell me.”
After B’s kindergarten teacher told me of his latest zinger, I decided to interrogate ask him about the incident on the way home from school.
“Mrs. D said you did a good job in reading today. What word did she ask you to read?”
“Did you get to use it in a sentence?”
“Yes, MA’AM. Do you remember what your sentence was?”
(Knowing grin) “Yes, MA’AM.”
“Well, I’d love to hear it.”
“‘My mother screamed at me.'”
“Your mother screamed at you.”
“B. Does your mother scream at you?”
“No, but it makes a very funny sentence.”
Meanwhile, A told her class that she LOVES peanut butter and pina colada sandwiches. In fact, she said, her mother just loves pina colada. Her mom has pina colada almost every day. A told me she told her class that pina colada is one of our family’s very favorite things. What in the world did I put in her lunch box that day, you ask? A peanut butter and NUTELLA sandwich. Sometimes she confuses words. For the record and before you call CPS and just in case anyone from our incredible school is reading, this is the only pina colada I allow the children to drink:
I’m expecting a visit from a member or two of the school board just any day to discuss my tendency to get drunk on coconutty island beverages and yell at my kids. I’ll let you know how everything turns out.
I won’t be seeing you tomorrow, but I didn’t want to leave this week without being sure that you had heard about my big plans for Saturday night. I’m going to a concert! It’s at THE Ryman Auditorium in Nashville and just wait until you hear who’s going to be there: Jon Foreman (from Switchfoot), Alison Krauss and Union Station, Big Kenny, Mat Kearney, Jars of Clay, Brandon Heath, NEEDTOBREATHE, Dave Barnes (oh, how I love him!), and Matt Wertz. Want to come? You can! Want to know what I love about this concert, besides the incredible line-up? I get to wear my pajamas. I don’t even have to leave my house! It’s all happening online at www.helphaitilive.com. All the ticket proceeds from the Nashville show are going towards Compassion International’s efforts to help Haiti. The nightly news may have moved on to other stories, but people in Haiti are still struggling to have their daily basic needs met. We can’t forget and move on to the next story.
UPDATE: I think I made it sound like I’m actually going to be at the concert in Nashville. I am not. I wish I were. But Compassion is broadcasting it live and I can watch it for free from the comforts of my own home! The concert starts at 7:30 p.m. CST and all you have to do is click over to http://www.helphaitilive.com and you can watch it with me…from the comforts of YOUR home.
In other news, I’ll be hopefully broadcasting live from Alabama next week. K and I have to attend a special training course in preparation for his upcoming job change this summer. I went to a junior version of this course a couple of years ago for one of his previous positions. They nicknamed that school “Charm School,” so I guess this is “Charm School 2.0.” I’m not sure the first course took anyway. (Ask my kids’ teachers if you doubt that.) From what I can ascertain, my schedule looks pretty full, but maybe I’ll have some time in the evenings to check in with my friends who live in my computer. Or maybe I’ll see you at the concert tomorrow night. I’m sure our paths will cross somewhere along the way. Until then, have a peanut butter and pina colada sandwich in my honor….and while you’re at it, scream at a kid. (I am SO just joking!)